The Subtle Art of Not Caring What Everyone Thinks


We have all been there. We go to do something but, before we can even start, we begin to worry about what people will think.  That’s because everyone wants to be liked and accepted.  The dairy community likes to think of itself as an all friendly and happy community.  The challenge is that, when your goal is to bring about change, you need to understand that you cannot be liked by everyone.  You have to learn how not to be concerned with what everyone else thinks.  Here at The Bullvine, we don’t care what everyone else thinks.

Editors note: The orginial post used the word F*** due to respect to readers of all ages we have changed this public post to be appropriate for all readers.

I am proud to say that since starting The Bullvine I have been able not to not care.  I have not had to care what everyone else was doing, what others were saying about me, or what people thought about me.  That’s because I did not care about what they thought I was doing for since day one I have been clear about what I wanted to achieve.  (Read more: TWICE THE BULL – HALF THE S**T, I’m Sorry, But I’ve Had Just About Enough Of… and THE BULLVINE HAS BITE!) We wanted to make a difference in the dairy world.  We wanted to be different give dairy breeders a voice.

misinterpretNot to Be Confused with Indifference

Not giving a f* does not mean being indifferent, in fact, we have been anything but indifferent. There have been many issues over the past four years that we have been very concerned about.  From photo ethics to the future of the breeding industry and, of course to the challenges breeders face every day, we certainly have had a strong opinion on these issues from day one.  Moreover, we have not been afraid to share our opinion with our readers.  What it does mean is that we have to be comfortable with being different.  We have to comfortable when we go to cow shows, and some closed minded people snicker at you.  You have to be comfortable when people attack your very soul on Facebook.  You have to be comfortable not giving a care what other people think.

When most people envision giving no care whatsoever, they envision a kind of perfect and serene indifference to everything, a calm that weathers all storms. That is very misguided.  Don’t confuse my indifference for passion for our ultimate goal.  Indifference would mean that we don’t care.  That we are some form of couch potatoes just sitting here not willing to stand up for their goals.  In fact, we have been on the front line many times, slugging it out, for the very issues we are most passionate about.

Indifference is the other publications that were so afraid of what others thought of them that they were paralyzed to act and now find themselves struggling to pay their bills.  They didn’t want to say anything to offend anyone because they were not sure if it would cost them, advertisers.  Funny thing is by doing nothing it has led to that exact result. Some of their key advertisers, ones that they coveted, have now become strategic partners with us here at The Bullvine.

To Not Care About Adversity, You Must First Care About Something More Important Than Adversity

Success is achieved when you stare failure in the face and shove your middle finger back at it. We certainly have proven that we don’t care about adversity, failure or about taking heat for our actions. We just sucked it up and then did it anyway. We know what has to be done to achieve our ultimate goal. Sometimes you have to have the guts to stand alone.

Sure we have had the odd lawsuit or two.  But we have also brought about the change we desired.  We have given breeders a voice. We have spoken about the issues no one else would touch.  Moreover, along the way we have developed the largest community of dairy breeders who are actively talking about the key issues we all face.  (Read more: Introducing The Milk House – Dairy Breeder Networking on Facebook).

In life, our time must be spent on something meaningful. There is no such thing as not caring about anything. The question is simply how we each choose to a lot our time. You only get a limited amount of time to give over your lifetime, so you must spend them with care.  When we’re young, we have tons of energy. Everything is new and exciting. Moreover, everything seems to matter so much. We care about everything and everyone — especially about what people are saying about us.

As we get older, we gain experience and begin to notice that most of these things have little lasting impact on our lives. Those people’s opinions, which we cared about so much before, have long been removed from our lives. We realize how little people pay attention to the superficial details about us and we focus on doing things more for our own integrity rather than for others. Essentially, we become more selective about the time we’re willing to give. This is something called ‘maturity.’ It’s nice, you should try it sometime. Maturity is what happens when one learns to only care about what’s truly worth caring about.

The Bullvine Bottom Line

In my life, I have care about many people and many things. I have also not cared about many people and many things. And those times I have not given have made all the difference.  Since starting The Bullvine, I have tested my ability to keep the eye on the ultimate goal and not care what people think about us, but rather understand what we are trying to achieve.  As we enter our fifth year, I am very proud of the work we have done and the actions we have taken, because it has led us to the position we are at today.  A voice for breeders during uncertain times.

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